Mickey, Donald & Goofy: The Three Musketeers 5*

Clip mashup, "musketeers". Traditional Disney cartoon musical. Dreams and teams win. Opera background has symphony and song. Stars and bubbles replace injuries.

Banjo-playing turtle narrates in "zee axzong fransay" to prelude stills and recurs. Tall black bass(et) hounds are Royal 17th century French guards. They rescue the street urchin trio, and dog Pluto, to "All for One" song, and gift him souvenir hat. Tones are not the original squeak, squawk, and hillbilly guffaw, but suit slapstick destruction the janitors wreak. Huge peg-leg Captain Pete scoffs their ambition, until Princess Minnie demands bodyguards. Guess who the villain assigns?

I liked the deep threatening-throated Pete (Jim Cummings) better than girly Mickey (Wayne Allwine), but "all for fun is fun for all". Princess Minnie dreams of true love despite skeptical side-kick lady-in-waiting Daisy, whose advice is classic "If you want love, get a dog". Pete plots assassination and coup with Mwahaha cow Clarabelle. My favorite moment might be her surprise romance. Sweet Wings of Love song.

Spoiler with Goofy: Mickey knows team-work wins out. He may be small, but his with friends coward and doofus, he's ten feet tall.

Extras are Language French (better because narrator not annoying faux Francais) or Spanish, games (choose silly singalong song - underpants, homework, cheese), activities ("Hats of Mickey" clips of 9 shorts L-R 1947 Beanstalk, Scrooge, Pauper, '36 Looking Glass, '38 Tailor '40 Fantasia '34 Gulliver '31 Jack & '31 Crusoe), music video boy trio singing "Three is the Magic Number", singalong "Wings of Love", Behind the Scenes, Commentary to scene better than some regular actor and director blather, Deleted slow narration Scenes in pencil-test version

Previews: Home on the Range, Princess Collection, Milan 2-disc (She is a modern step above passive wait-for-rescue gals)

The True Story of Puss 'n Boots 1-2*

Polish Trailer with funny scene is not Shrek Banderas, but does have silly song charm if you change expectation to French animated musical with English songs: "I'm so pretty" from West Side Story, Greensleeves, and classical themes: William Tell, Beethoven, Danube waltz. Clever inventions are ostrich carriages (reminiscent of Flintstone Rock Vegas dinosaurs), fly-swatter sceptre, two chase fight scenes, one on a conveyor (only similarity to Shrek).

Choose French audio for lips to match words, without bro, slang, hemm-hawwing. Queens say biggie, hat's off, bupkiss, and yup? William Shatner voices lead, but the high squeaky, repetitive, smarmy tones are undistinguishable and unpleasant. Architecture is mosque-like, other credits French and E. European.

Like classic Russian tales, youngest miller's son pony-tailed Peter inherits the large, nearly as tall talking cat, on condition he makes special stored red leather into tall boots and His older brothers get the mill. He and the Princess are supposedly magnificent dancers. Puss promises the boy's royal crush will result in marriage. At the first inn stop, the pixie-cut masked princess executes her dream passion, first and only real dance in the whole film. The rest are just poses. Why do women all have big hips? French?

The evil chamberlain in a creepy beetle carapace-like cape wants to marry her. Magic candies transform competing suitors into warty toads for a mountain castle dwelling ogre, who hulk-like grows giant octopus tentacles, but dreams of one day becoming a swan. Jamaican chimp pianist is our team's inside man, taming the monster with music.

Extras (in English) Shatner interview has silent question pages. Slide show has 17 stills that summarize plot ending with full cast bow Trailer covers full story. Phase4 previews: Gruffalo, Jane Lynch Disco Worms, Antonio Banderas (finally!) The Missing Lynx, Forrest Whittaker Dragon Hunters (How to Train a Dragon off-take, Not Original!).

Tangled 2011 5*

"This is the story of how I died". Motivations, methods, and secrets tangle up in confusion to an almost sad and scary end. One big birthday, furiously fast 24 hours. Only the tower-long hair is like the original Rapunzel, so less predictable than many re-tellings.

Preview makes me laugh every time: frypan bonk, kungfu hair fight, "The Smolder". Did I see this "Tangled 2" as Xmas special?

Beloved Disney heroines dance, lift, wrap, kiss, in dawn, moonlight - match perfect to perfect melody. Uplifting for Valentine, any day. Rapunzel, Flynn, and other "Legendary Dreamers" set to "Lift Me Up", and other love songs. Having lost my own dad before I knew him, I'm not so keen on Lion King brat who causes his father's death, but Mulan and Hunchback of Notre Dame touch hearts set to "Heartline".

This is more than a silly musical cartoon, because serious lessons invisibly painlessly slip in. Adults, maybe parents, who "protect" you, can be abusive liars. Reaching for dreams can be dangerous, achieving them a disappointment, requiring sacrifice. What we want (freedom of choice) can be confused with how we reach (theft) our perception of that goal (wealth). We can change who we are by what we do. Help can come from unlikely places. An unexpectedly effective weapon can be a frypan.

Prelude:

Long ago, a single golden drop of the sun grew into a magic flower. Sung a sweet verses, the glow healed. The next events puzzle me. If only people did not greedily hoard for themselves, couldn't maybe single petals heal everybody forever? Another lesson about win-win results of sharing?


Mother Gothel (Donna Murphy) hid the bloom for centuries, to keep herself youthful. When the pregnant queen fell deathly sick, the blossom was found and made into a healing drink. The healthy babe (Mandy Moore) had golden hair and enormous endearing eyes like her mom.

When Gothel snuck in and sang, the hair glowed and restored her. When she cut off a lock, the hair turned brown and useless. So Gothel kidnapped Rapunzel, hid her in a tower, and raised her as her own, claiming "I love you most", and stays lovely outside, bad inside.

The Biggest Day of their Lives:

Every year the girl sees the castle release a sky-full of lanterns to fly free on her birthday, and yearns to find their source, but Gothel refuses. Finally, on her 18th birthday, the orphan thief Flynn Rider (Zachary Levy also TV Chuck, the perfect combination of looks, amiability, cleverness, and bumbling) climbs her tower. He stole her tiara from the castle, is on the run, pursued by his villainous cohorts and the royal guards, led by the horse Maximus, who trails and wags like a dog.

Max and Pascal, the princess's pet chameleon have no voices, but credit Disney animators for extremely expressive faces and bodies. A helpful, most unlikely singing Thug Hook is Brad Garrett from TV Everybody Loves Raymond, his brother Robert.

The winding road leads back to the tower, but the ups and downs, traps and escapes, carry us a long way in a single day.

Voices: Mandy Moore, Zachary Levy, Donna Murphy